PODCAST: Resolution

Nine years and nine months later, here we are at the resolution.

Never say never and all that but this is definitely the last of the regular episodes of Doctor Who: The Eleventh Hour Podcast, the podcast with the increasingly out-of-date name. We’ll definitely be back even if it’s just one more rambly catch-up, but when the new series starts tomorrow we’ll be able to just watch Doctor Who and not worry about explaining why we feel the way we do about the episodes, which will be very nice.

Absolutely the best to all of you who stuck with us, and all of you who didn’t but still gave us your attention for a short time. We didn’t do anything special to deserve this attention but you made us feel like we did.

Thanks for sticking with me (Chris) in particular through my off-colour jokes and racist accents and being a big part of helping me weed those out. Thanks to anyone who actually DID follow the intricacies of Joe’s love life over the last decade and, while there must surely have been people out there who listened and didn’t like the show, thanks to them too for just going away quietly and not giving us an unnecessarily hard time about it.

As for the episode itself, we are finally joined Mr Chris from the Pharos Project podcast, who kept us soldiering through the discussion when Joe and I were ready to throw in the towel and end the recording. He had notes and everything, as you’ll hear when you listen to RESOLUTION.

And that’s it, nothing left now but to part ways with the traditional Doctor Who farewell:

Live long, and prosper.

PODCAST: The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos

So, here we are. We’ll be back tomorrow with a very special guest for Resolution but, since that’s a New Year Special, this is our final Doctor Who episode proper.

As such, we did finally record at Joe’s then-flat, thus finally adding one more location that we’ve recorded the show in, and for old times’ sake, we even dug out the digital recorder we relied on for years which, for reasons unknown, decided to give us a real low quality recording the kind of which you might hear on a much worse podcast. We literally can’t explain why that happened so we hope the results don’t trouble you too much.

Anyway, enough of that. It’s The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos, the kind of title that sounds like a sci-fi parody and features a returning villain. There!s usually a sense of diminishing returns when this happens and it’s the case here too, but with the unfortunate truth being that this villain wasn’t any good the first time. In fact, the best idea in this whole episode has already appeared in Doctor Who back in 1978.

It’s inauspicious to say the least, but hey, why not throw caution to the wind and join us anyway for THE BATTLE OF RANSKOOR AV KOLOS?

PODCAST: It Takes You Away

As promised: another day, another EH?

This one will take you away into a weird little Nordic world as seen in frankly one of the strangest Doctor Who stories of the entire run, not just the post-2005 era.

It’s just Joe and Chris this week as they navigate this bizarre little gem.

Listen to IT TAKES YOU AWAY.

PODCAST: The Witchfinders

Festive balls, y'alls!

After months of procrastination, Chris has realised that there's mere days before there'll be new Doctor Who. Four days, in fact. And whaddayaknow? There's four episodes left to upload as well.

You know what this means:

It's time for an episode a day! Prepare for now anachronistic references to the temperature in the UK and other such stuff, as well as references to a theoretical new podcast which is now a very real new podcast available at www.amityvillecalamityville.com

It's The Witchfinders - a seeming rare modern Doctor Who "romp" that's actually fun, despite the grim subject matter, largely due to the presence of Alan Cumming as the exceedingly camp King James. Also, possibly the first time since Jodie Whittaker stepped into the role that the Doctor being a woman has become crucial to the plot.

Joe and Chris are joined by Holly, the co-creator and co-host of Amityville Calamityville and you will be left in no doubt as to whether we liked this episode or not, also it provides us sassenachs the opportunity to do some Scotsplaining.

Listen to THE WITCHFINDERS

PODCAST: Kerblam!

Funny fez callback.
THAT'S KERBLAM!

Guest spot from Lee Mack.
THAT'S KERBLAM!

Akinola soundtrack.
THAT'S KERBLAM!

A powerful, incisive critique of Amazon's business practices.
NOT KERBLAM!

Welcome to the first Doctor Who television story to have an exclamation mark in its title, Kerblam! A fun, though pretty toothless, look at an Amazon-style company writ large and one that makes a virtue of a large number of TARDIS companions by splitting them up and it's usually quite fun when the Doctor ends up getting a job for a while.

In the hopes that this episode will not have the massive issues we've experienced recently with updates, let's just be bold and say we hope you enjoy KERBLAM!

PODCAST: Demons of the Punjab

It's the final stretch. After adding an American TV-style hiatus to help Joe transition to his new life in the Land of the Free, here comes the last cavalcade of episodes. This tragic, marriage-themed one full of simmering tension is obviously the most appropriate wedding gift for the man himself.

So, It's Yaz's spotlight episode and it finds the spotlight aimed mostly away from her. That doesn't make it a bad episode, though, as Doctor Who takes the opportunity to do what it can often do so well - inform about the past while commenting on the present.

Join us, finally, for DEMONS OF THE PUNJAB

PODCAST: The Tsuranga Conundrum

It's the Tonga Congo! You know, that episode with the hospital ship and the little alien and the pregnant man. The episode that's really rubbish, you know the one.

Certainly Chris thought he knew that when sitting down with Joe to rewatch it for the final dregs of this, the Eleventh Hour Podcast and yet hearts and minds are always subject to change. Could you be about to bear witness to that amazing, human experience? Or will the podcast just confirm how poor the episode is once again? Find out, when you...

Listen to THE TSURANGA CONUNDRUM

PODCAST: Arachnids in the UK

The phoning-it-in nature of this final season of The Eleventh Hour Podcast continues apace with this blunt dissection of one of the most poorly-titled Doctor Who episodes in recent memory. At least "Let's Kill Hitler" wasn't a near-nonsensical pun.

Will we get through the whole podcast without mentioning Sex and the City or The Good Wife? How long before one of us plays a guitar? Will there be more jumping around or another surprise guest? Do these count as clickbait? We're frankly not sure.

Listen to ARACHNIDS IN THE UK if that's the sort of thing you think you'd like to do.

PODCAST: Rosa

Well, here we are. This is the episode that, prior to the start of Doctor Who series 11, people were the most interested in and worried about.

It's an episode whose themes we couldn't hope to do justice to, so you'll be pleased to know we didn't really try to and instead produced our most off-topic episode ever. It's got lots of chat about TV shows based on DC superheroes, if that's your thing.

Anyway, it's the last run of the podcast and more than ever before we're doing what we want.

Join Joe, Chris and almost certainly nobody else given that we've never had a guest host for the entire run of the podcast, and

Listen to ROSA

PODCAST: The Ghost Monument

This final run of The Eleventh Hour Podcast continues apace, despite technical errors at every level of production. Was The Ghost Monument worth the effort we went to while trying to record this podcast? Is the lovely Art Malik enough to carry the episode? Where IS the reload? Is acetylene flammable? How exciting must this episode be if these are the questions we find ourselves writing in this synopsis?

Listen to THE GHOST MONUMENT

PODCAST: The Woman Who Fell to Earth

It’s the end, but the moment has been prepared for:

Surprise! The final season of EHPodcast is upon you and yer lads are back for a belated look at Jodie Whittaker’s first series behind the TARDIS controls.

Expect our usual shallow analysis and digressions and be very, very loved.

Listen to THE WOMAN WHO FELL TO EARTH

PODCAST: Twice Upon a Time (Christmas in July)

It's the traditional, heavily delayed EHPodcast Christmas Special!

In addition to this, it also continues the current tradition of our podcasts starting with an impromptu apology from Chris regarding the appalling lateness of the episode.

Anyway, enough of that. Remember Christmas 2017? Remember how the Doctor went through a low-stakes adventure where every revelation was deeply obvious if you applied any level of thought to it? Remember when Jodie showed up cosplaying as the front cover of the first Tasmin Archer album?

Good times one and all. Enjoy them again and again with this commemorative unseasonal mess from Joe and Chris as they discuss TWICE UPON A TIME.

PODCAST: Bumper Series 10 Cleanup EPICsode

Hello! After a series of physical and technical mishaps, unavailabilities (we don't care if that's not a word) and other poor excuses, here's the rest of Doctor Who series 10, including discussions of: Empress of Mars, The Eaters of Light, World Enough and Time & The Doctor Falls.

Apologies for the real drop off in enthusiasm towards the end but who knows - if you listen all in one go, you might be feeling the same by then and welcome it.

Hopping Holidays to all and we'll be back within the next five years to discuss the upcoming Christmas special, Twice Upon a Time.

Listen to THE CLEANUP EPICSODE

PODCAST: 13

Joe and Chris recorded a ramshackle reaction podcast to today's exciting reveal of the Thirteenth Doctor. Converting and uploading this on mobile devices has been so tiring an experience that we have no energy left for a fun write up, so you're getting this instead.

LISTEN TO 13

PODCAST: The Lie of the Land

In an exciting adventure, Britain realises it has the power to fight a totalitarian regime, and also there was an episode of Doctor Who on.

Not a big write up, this. Join a post-General Election 2017 Joe & Chris as they try to resist the charms of sleep, play an unusual sampler patch, relate the tale of Beverly Crusher fucking a ghost, make factual errors about Captain Sensible records, discuss the merits of American birds and generally say words for about an hour and forty minutes. You should know by now whether you like that kind of thing or not.

Listen to THE LIE OF THE LAND

PODCAST: The Pyramid at the End of the World

If it's getting light again outside then it means that another EHPodcast is done and dusted and ready to pour into your waiting aural canals, you lucky people.

This week's Doctor Who put the cat among the pigeons with its talk of consent and whether it was a metaphor for THAT kind of consent or not and, since it's not our job to do so, we fail to arrive at a solid answer ourselves, although we are also fighting our second week of the world not having any air in it so who knows. We're definitely on the verge of selling out the whole of humanity just to get a nice breeze at this point.

Join us in THE PYRAMID AT THE END OF THE WORLD

PODCAST: Extremis

We want to get this out of the way right now: this is definitely not our best episode. In our defence, for the last three days, the very atmosphere has been on fire and there's absolutely no moisture left in the air that we breathe so we got somewhat distracted just by trying to stay conscious.

Luckily, in a move that's saved us before, we were able to rely on our excellent listeners to keep us going with feedback.

Still, we're sure you'll get some enjoyment out of the podcast and next week we'll record in a tepid shower if it becomes necessary.

"Enjoy" Extremis

PODCAST: Oxygen

Jamie Mathieson is back with another blinding episode. Will it be his final go at Doctor Who, or will he be back under Chibnall? The smart money says don't hold your breath.

The Doctor takes Bill for her first proper trip into deep space and everything goes perfectly fine.

Meanwhile, in the world of Joe & Chris, there's guitar chugging to be done, albums to name, theoretical Skins characters to devise and grandparents' doors to describe.

Have a listen to OXYGEN.

PODCAST: Knock Knock

It's spooky times down in Doctor Who world again, this time as a creepy old house makes some noise and some young students get wood.

David Suchet proves particularly impressive given the stuff he's given to work with and Bill shows off a new hair-do. There's some piano-based vault flirting and Harry Sullivan's grandson is an imbecile.

Join Joe and Chris as they prepare a wooden lady to be presented to society, continue their run of magically picking information out of the recesses of their brains and probably some other stuff, I dunno, it's gone five in the morning now.

Find out who's there by listening to KNOCK KNOCK.

PODCAST: Smile & Thin Ice (MEGACAST)

Blimey, kids, it's been a right couple of weeks at the offices of the Eleventh Hour Podcast with an unplanned flat move putting a spanner in the works of getting last week's episode done.

But, brave adventurers that we are, we got ourselves together over a couple of days and decided to record what we expected to be a quick, feedback-focussed double episode. Instead, we seem to have churned out a 2.5 hour epic. Sorry about that.

Unfortunately, due to the fact that our free podcast host requires a specific cap on file size, it does mean that this episode has needed to be encoded at a lower bitrate than usual, leading to our worst-sounding episode since the similarly lengthy group therapy session that was VINCENT AND THE DOCTOR nearly seven years ago. We even had some last minute feedback from listener Kirsten who gets her own little section at the end of the show.

Despite all the tribulations, it's nice to be back up to date and we hope you enjoy, even if the audio is a bit chunkier than usual.

No silly list of things we may have discussed, just a request that you listen to THIN SMILE.